Let’s talk about the huge elephant in the room: We’ve all been living with this strange Covid-19 pandemic since mid-March (some of you sooner than that, depending which part of the world you call home). Because of this, I had to come to terms with letting go of my romantic notions of pregnancy and accept how my pregnancy would really go. Being that Ben and I found out about my pregnancy on February 21, 2020, we were able to experience the first few weeks of knowing (and keeping it to ourselves) in an old-”normal”-life fashion. We spent one weekend in Charlottesville, another weekend out near Ben’s farm, and had a healthy social life during those few weeks while enjoying some of our favorite parts of Richmond. I had picked up guest teaching at Pure Barre RVA and was excited to connect to the community there, including several coworkers that were already moms and/or were also pregnant. I (and most likely every other pregnant woman at that point) was expecting the next nine months to be like my own version of pregnancies I see on TV, starting with the basics of glowing, growing, teaching Pure Barre and dance classes, and making life-long friends at local birthing classes. I dreamt of inappropriate strangers coming up to me to touch my belly, make comments on my belly size, ask how far along I am and ask if it’s a girl or a boy. My vision culminating with an amazing in-person baby shower, full of my new local friends and anyone willing to travel, and with my family visiting near my due date to welcome this little human, while helping Ben & I adjust to life with our new baby…
And then, that second week of March hit, when news of the virus's spread became more real, and case numbers were growing and moving closer to Richmond. I remember breaking down at one point during that week, crying to Ben about how terrified I was of the stealth virus: everyone was the potential threat. A virus and fever during the first trimester of pregnancy can have harmful effects on development, not to mention that pregnant women tend to have a compromised immune system. I was scheduled to teach two classes that week, and was feeling a bit nervous. I stuck to my commitments and used lots of sanitizer, but after I left the Pure Barre studio that day and before Pure Barre RVA (and the rest of Virginia) shut down and switched to virtual classes, I decided to not continue to teach, due to the threat it might pose to my pregnancy. The next day, I nervously sweated my way through the grocery store, attempting to stock up on much food as I could fit in my cart while avoiding all the carefree shoppers as best I could. I must have looked crazy. That was the last time I went into a grocery store… I. Was. Terrified.
Classy bathroom selfie with N-95 mask at one of my many solo prenatal doctor visits during the Covid-19 pandemic.
After that weekend passed, Ben & I chose to lockdown at what I lovingly call the “Richmond Granny House”, only leaving the house for me to attend my prenatal checkups (to which Ben was not allowed to accompany me at first) with the most effective and most uncomfortable N-95 mask. It was a sweet couple of months there, lying out in the lawn, chatting across the road to our lovely friends and neighbors, Ben working on projects in the garage shop, and sanitizing our Kroger grocery deliveries with fervor. My heart broke the morning of my first ultrasound, when I got a call to tell me the ultrasound office was not allowing visitors starting that day, and so Ben would not get to see our sweet babe. I got very used to attending all my appointments solo, so much so that when they first loosened up the ropes to allow one visitor per patient, I missed the memo. Luckily, he was able to join me later on in my pregnancy.
Other heartbreaking decisions we faced due to the pandemic included planning a virtual baby shower rather than an in-person baby shower, Ben going up to Stamford, CT, for work solo while I stayed in Richmond, VA, from my 32nd to 38th week of pregnancy rather than me joining him, and our families resolving to meet our sweet baby boy over FaceTime and Zoom rather than traveling from their prospective parts of the country. And forget about a baby moon! We were too cautious to feel comfortable traveling anywhere, so we opted to make our days at home as special as our creativity would allow.
We have been able to maintain our health thus far, something to be grateful for certainly, but I really look forward to the day when we will be able to visit with friends and family in-person!
